This time that I’ve been away from blogging, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking.
Where am I going with my photography?
I had started to lose sight of why I wanted to do it in the first place.
I got really caught up in the world of trying to be a better portrait photographer. Trouble is, I was looking at other work as “better than my own”, and “How can I be more like them?” (if they were successful). There are SO many photographers out there who are producing work that is the same look, the same type of processing, the same current photographic fads. I mean absolutely NO disrespect to anyone, a lot of the work that I see out there is beautiful! ….. it’s just that I realized that my heart didn’t want to go in the same direction. Even though a lot of this work is outstanding, it’s not who I choose to be.
There may not be a lot of people out there who love what I do, or they don’t care for the type of work I produce, or they might not think that I’m very good at what I do. That’s perfectly OK with me. I am shooting to make one person happy – myself.
I have been reading WAY too many comments from people who are trying to get into the professional portrait photographer business, and it just seems like they have one stressful situation after another. I don’t want to be stressed out by this, it’s supposed to be my escape!
I REALLY appreciate the love and support that I have received from people (especially when it comes to the portraits that I have done)! I have come to a decision. I am not going to offer any more portrait services….. not for quite some time, anyway. This is for a few reasons. The first one I’ve already mentioned (don’t need the stress). The second reason is because I just don’t have the time! I work full-time outside the home, and when I am at home, I want to spend time with my family (I feel like I already don’t have enough time for that). The last (main) reason why, is because I haven’t felt very well for a while now. I don’t know if it’s related to my MS or not, but I don’t think it’s fair if I promise to do portraits for someone, and then tell them at the last minute that I can’t show up because I am not feeling well enough to go.
It’s not that people have been beating down my door or anything, but I have had a few requests or inquiries about doing portraits.
IF I ever decide to try doing portrait work again, people will have to understand that with me, what you see is what you get. I will not sacrifice my own style for what people want. If they don’t like my style, then I wouldn’t be the right photographer for them.
I will continue to shoot, but it will be in my own style. I need to figure out who I am. I will not try to copy anyone else’s style, just because they seem to be attracting a lot of attention with it.
I do appreciate all of you – for following what I do, and for your wonderful comments (or, even if you just click “Like”)! I am still sorting things out, so I may be slow for a while yet.
Those are most of the thoughts that have been rattling around in my head lately…… 
Since this is STILL a photography blog, I can’t write a post and NOT share a photo! This is a self portrait that I took a couple of days ago. I have never been very comfortable in front of the camera, and I don’t like to stick with the “traditional” look. After seeing this photo, I know what I need to work on (as far as technique), but hey, it’s a start!
So, IF I don’t get back here soon – I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas and New Year (or any other holiday that is coming up that you celebrate, don’t want to leave anyone out)! 
Thanks for stopping by!
- Holly
You do have to find your own groove Holly. I am struggling with that right now. Keep doing what you do and you’ll be fine. Thanks for keeping us updated on your status. I hope you feel better…and I hope you and your family have a fabulous Christmas!
Good for you Holly! I’m glad to see that you came to the conclusion of needing to be your true self and be the type of photographer for you — and not anyone else. Keep doing what makes you feel good and inspired even if it’s not the norm or fad. It’s your uniqueness that will set you apart from everyone else, such as your self-portrait — it’s very creative and captures my attention more than the usual full face shot. I would not have thought of shooting a portrait from this angle and your use of light is perfect for revealing just enough of your facial features to set the perfect mood to go with your story. That… is what makes a photo perfect. It tells the story.
Wishing you and your family a joyful Christmas!
Good for you, Holly! doing what you are passionate about will always produce better results than those things we just know how to do.
Be true to yourself. If people are not happy with your style then they really should look for someone else. Art is a subjective and creative thing – and is not photography a part of art? I like to think that it is. There will always be those who like your style and what you are as an artist. Personally I love your photographs and that is what keeps me coming back to your blog.
Enjoy the holiday season with your family.
I know where you are coming from, Holly. When I started, I had visions of being a great landscape photographer. But my images never seemed to be what I saw in the first place. To me, even though I still sell a lot of them, I don’t think they are what they could be. Then I discovered wildlife, and especially bird photography. Now I feel that I finally am one of the best, and I absolutely love doing it. So sometimes it take a little time to find you niche. I still do landscapes, but my heart is with the wildlife.
By the way, I have calls all the time to do weddings and portraits. I just refer those to the ‘pros’. Like you, I don’t want or need the stress.
Merry Christmas to you and yours.
We all have to do what is best for us and I’ve learned the worst thing we can do as photographers or anything in life is to compare ourselves to others. The only one we SHOULD compare ourselves to is us! I’m trying to build up my business but only to a point I am comfortable with. Merry Christmas to you and your family too
You have to be true to yourself, Holly, and I’m happy to hear that your time away from blogging has led you to that realization. Have a wonderful holiday season!
holly your photographs all are beautiul, you’ve got to do what makes you happy
people in my life are always telling me what i should be doing with my photos – sell them ,start a business etc
i’ve learnt to just smile & thank them for the compliment – it’s not something i actively want to do at all
it’s what doing what makes you most happiest, for me it’s capturing photos and sharing them on my blog
hope you’ll be back soon, have a lovely christmas x
Hi Holly. I enjoy seeing whatever type of photography you like to post. That’s why I started blogging – to enjoy sharing photos. If we can all add a little beauty to the world, I think it is all worthwhile.
Holly, you and I have a special bond. I love following you, and am glad that you are doing what is right in your heart. I will always be a supporter, admirer, and fan!
Merry Christmas to you, Holly! I love your photography, no matter what the subject, because I love YOUR style. I hope you’re feeling better by now. If not, I hope you’ll have time to rest and recuperate over the holidays. In case I don’t “see” you again before the turning of the calendar, Happy New Year! Wishing you all the best for 2013.